Life is all about making choices and prioritization! No wonder the best feeling in the world is to become a mum and that one feeling should never turn into a stress or regret. Talking from my experience, I used to feel sad looking at the mothers’ struggle at work and made me jittery, forcing myself to I think “if I ever want to have kids and compromise my career?” Later, realized that we are the ones making it difficult for ourselves and not the newborn which has just made life even prettier. If you take the right decision at the right time and know your priorities, life will be as simple as you expect it to be. Today, we look at important 10 tips for going back to work after baby. More than anything, this feeling should be a great one to set the right expectation and the correct picture as an example to other women of our society!
There was another instance, that I would love to share. A close friend of mine who got married in her late 20s. She was an HR manager in a very well known firm, doing awesome with her job. She climbed the success ladder pretty quick and early in her career. I gave her a call one fine day to say hello and to my surprise, she informed me that she was pregnant. My happiness touched the heights and I got super excited to know that she was carrying. It was such a wonderful news. Although, honestly I was not too sure if she had planned for a kid this early in her marriage. So, I paid a visit to my friend after her delivery, super excited to see the baby. It took me by surprise to see her in shambles, unable to really deal with the new member in the house! She discussed with me her problems. The major one disturbing her the most was that she was unable to concentrate on her work. Neither had she taken care of her health ( I understand that she obviously had put some mass due to pregnancy but has no time to get back to shape, and only grown more). She had a list of complains to crib about and we discussed it for hours! This took me by shock to know that the smartest woman I had known in my life, who could manage umpteen of her things single-handedly throughout her life, could not manage this change of having her own baby? That is when I decided to make myself pretty affirmative and knew what it should be like to go to work after baby. I planned each and every aspect and bit of motherhood. The below pointers are surely going to help a career-oriented woman to grow stronger and smarter both at home and at work.
Tips for Going Back to Work After Baby
1. Have no guilt
The first and very foremost thing is to remove the guilt you might have to leave the baby and go to work! Whether you want to go back or you have to go back, you do not become a bad parent. More than 75% of the American mothers work outside of the home and yes, you should be proud to be a part of it. It will take some time to get used to this changed world and transition but believe in yourself, you will do it!
Being patient and giving yourself some time is the only way out here. Your priorities will fall at its place in time and you will see it happening. Remember, you have to feel good about anything to do the best in. You are supporting your family and giving yourself an identity and a little space away from kids. Be a role model, doing what is best for yourself, family and the lovely kid.
2. Look Good and feel good
You might have lovely maternity clothes in your wardrobe really, but doesn’t mean you need to fit into it even after the tot has made a way out of you! You need to feel “normal” and get your body to where it was. Yes, if your body took 9 months to get to this or maybe 10, show some patience and interest while it tries to go back to where it started. It is usually said that it takes about 6-8 weeks for the uterus to go back to pre-pregnancy size. Pamper yourself with some good massage, haircuts and some manicure and pedicure
Get some time off your daily routine mandatorily to exercise and the best-recommended aftercare is yoga. It keeps you physically and mentally healthy and stress-free. Indulge in some me-time and feel good about it.
3. Learn to say NO
Do not be drowned by your work pressure. You cannot be stressed with the things you have to do. Start saying a “No” at work politely. Ask for flexibility right away and make the expectations clear during your first week before people could just push work towards you and you succumb to it. Let the boss know it is temporary in a way and you will learn quickly with the new baby at home that needs you more. You could do that easily by scheduling a meeting with him professionally and tell him what suits you the best (be it the timing or the work pattern). Talk to him about your focus points for the week or the month and keep the lesser important bit for later or share it with someone else for a while.
4. Ask for help
Surely parenting is not just a mom’s job to do. And, going back to work after the baby is even tougher. Even though the partner wants to help more, moms have a hard time letting them do it. If your partner doesn’t help himself, train yourself to ask for things and such that he extends his support to you. It is okay to split the responsibility and work towards the same goal.
You do not need to do it all – at once. Keeping a house helper is absolutely normal. Imagine to spend more time with your kid when you are back from work and do not have to spend time in the kitchen, yet the dinner is ready to be served hot. Take it easy and hold back your pace. It is a lifelong marathon which has just begun.
5. A Breast Pump
It is highly recommended that you buy a breast pump (R). Get your baby used to take bottled milk. Keep offering until your baby has accepted to drink from it easily. This way you can use the breast pump to get the milk out for your baby and could be fed to it. Speak about this to a lactation consultant and do as guided.
6. Be Transparent
It is absolutely okay for people to know you are struggling and that it is difficult. Remember to convince yourself you are doing just fine and that let the people know it is your new motherhood. It is okay to have to leave your baby- “he is just OK”. The babies do not develop a sense of time the moment they are out. So they do not even know you have gone for hours. There is no time to be emotional but being practical is the key.
7. Daycares?
You might as well get some thoughtless terrible comments like “Why would you have a baby just to have someone else raise it?” Those people are just idiots. Stay away from such people and thoughts. Plan and speak to the daycares you would want your baby to go beforehand so that you do not end up on a waitlist. Choose day-care wisely. Spend some time off your week while returning from work to go to the daycare and speak to the authorities to see how your baby is coming up there. It is good to keep a close check on your baby’s progress.
8. Snuggle Time
When you are back from your office, take some time out to snuggle the little one. We can understand how it feels to keep away from your sweetheart for hours, and it is so good to come back to the baby after a long day. Your laundry, dishes and other household work can wait. You deserve to give the baby enough love, smell her baby scent and enjoy those very little moment you think about the whole day with your baby. Enjoy being a mom completely and that little hour of the day with your baby can give you a sense of satisfaction.
9. Me-Time
You need to have some “me-time” that makes you happy. Even if it means to just take a stroll with your baby or see your friends, just do it. Do not get overburdened with responsibilities and it does not have to be done all alone. “Me-Time” is just to fuel yourself up and that makes you happy.
10. Practice to get everything ready a night before
It becomes tough to get out of the door without having set the things for the day. You can layout your outfit a night before. Good to keep the babies bag replenished with towels and diapers etc. which you may need for the day-care next day. Prepare some coffee beforehand if you know that you need it the minute you wake up. If you are really struggling with your time, take a shower at night before if you do not suffer from crazy hair the next morning. This just helps you to give enough kisses before moving out for your work the next day, yes we know it means a lot.
Keep up your good health, the baby cannot afford a sick mom. Eat healthy in intervals and remember that it shall to pass. By the time you turn around to see, your baby would have started walking and talking. All you would be left with is memories and smiles on your face. Keep a baby’s picture framed in your office to feel good about it and give frequent calls to check on him. It is okay to be worried, but not okay to be stressed. I hope these tips for going back to work after baby really helps.
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