Children are not always able to control their emotions and sometimes burst out in anger. Anger in children, is very common and a general emotion shown. Strategies to help children, learn how to work out and express anger in an appropriate manner, can deal this problem.
How To Recognize Anger In Children:
Any changes, than usual, in your child’s thoughts and feelings will lead to changes in their body language and their behavior. These include:
- Clenched fists
- Tightness or tenseness in their body
- Verbal outbursts
- A particular facial expression
- Hitting out
Children, can show anger in many different forms, from a verbal outburst to being physically aggressive and causing damage. It could make children act in a way that is harmful to themselves or others.
Signs Of Emotional Outbursts Which You Should Be Concerned Of:
Most of the children show tantrums. They may sometimes, outburst, if they are frustrated or may be resistant, if asked to do something, which they do not want to do. When kids show this activity repeatedly, or when they cannot control their anger in a particular situation, it may be more than typical behavior.
Few of the signs which children show are:
You should be concerned if tantrums and outbursts of your child occur past the age in which they are developmentally expected, generally up to about 7 or 8 years old. If their behavior is dangerous to oneself or others and cause any serious trouble at school.
Such angry behaviors may exclude them from play dates and birthday parties. A child’s tantrums may cause a lot of conflict at home and disrupt family life. If he/she is upset, of the fact that they cannot control their anger, makes him/her feel bad about themselves.
Understanding Anger In Children:
There are few underlying causes, what triggers your child’s behavior. Understand the reasons for anger in children.
1. ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder):
Children who experience impulsivity and hyperactivity, and those affected with ADHD(R), may have trouble in controlling their behavior. These children, even find it difficult to follow instructions or change from one activity to another, which makes appear resistant and angry.
Tantrums, and arguments happen even due to, their inability to focus and complete tasks. This does not imply that children have been diagnosed with ADHD.
2. Anxiety:
Anxiety in children, is generally shown, who generally seem to be angry and defiant. If children, have anxiety and they hide it, it may lash out at a situation, where she cannot handle pressure and may cause her distress. Children, may show a tantrum or refuse to do something to avoid the source of acute fear.
3. Trauma or neglect:
Actions that happen out in school, are the result of trauma, neglect, or chaos at home. Mostly, kids with ADHD, also experience trauma.
4. Learning problems:
If your child has a lot of trouble with math, and math problems, and acts out repeatedly in school or during homework time, there is a possibility that he/she has an undiagnosed learning disorder.
5. Sensory processing issues:
Your child may have trouble with sensory issues, they are getting from the world around them, such as, if your child is oversensitive, or under sensitive, to stimulation, and too much light or noise can make her uncomfortable, anxious, distracted, or overwhelmed.
6. Autism:
Autistic children(R), are even prone to dramatic meltdowns. They may tend to be rigid, and any unexpected change, can make them upset. Children may even lack the language and communication skills to express what he wants or needs.
Dealing With Anger In Children:
1. Do not yell or challenge your child when he is angry
Most parents, challenge their kids and yell at them, to deal with angry outbursts in children. Doing this way, will only increase your feeling of being out of control. The best thing to handle a situation, is to stay calm. Harsh or angry behaviors in a parent, tend to aggravate a child’s aggression, be it verbal or physical. By staying calm, you can teach your child, the type of behavior you want to see in them.
2. Do not try to reason with your child when they are in the middle of a tantrum, tired or angry outburst
Many parents, think about logic, when their kids are angry. This could always be a challenge for kids, as they will not have the capacity to stop and think of the reason, like we adults do. Try not to talk verbally when you deal with an angry child, and instead use different techniques.
3. Pay attention to your physical reactions
Your senses will tell you about your physical reactions. Paying attention to your own reactions, will also help your child pay attention to himself, as he will not worry about you or your emotions. When a child throws a tantrum, and if you do not respond to him calmly, he will work even harder and try to get your attention. So, you need to handle your outburst quickly and effectively first.
4. Do not get physical with your child
Remember, not to get into any fight with your child. As a parent, it is important to be a good role model and address your role properly to them. If you get physical with your child, you are only teaching him to solve his problems with aggression.
Medications do not help fix defiant behavior or aggression. These can only reduce the symptoms of ADHD, anxiety, and other disorders and improve the conditions for working on those behaviors.
Behavioral approaches that have parents and children working together are key in helping the situation.
By Supraja
